I think I'm feeling homesick. Last night I dreamt that I was on or near the campus of my college alma mater. And we were playing the University of Tennessee and for some reason both the cheerleading squads of my school and of Tenn decided to hang out at my dormroom/apartment. (It kept morphing.) Now, I've never been a gal who's popular with the likes of cheerleaders. Their ilk were the ones who'd laugh loudest when human stains in high school would knock books out of my hands or otherwise harass me. But in my dream, I felt older and wiser and all these kids wanted to know was where to get good coffee or chinese food. And it had been such a long time since I'd spent time on campus, and in reality, so much has changed on that campus and the surrounding area that I really wouldn' t know. I gave them my suggestions anyway. And I teased the Tenn cheerleaders: "Congratulations on winning the Rose Bowl!" They rolled their eyes. "Oh! Yeah. Not you. Sorry!"
But the whole dream felt like that song from Avenue Q, "I wish I could go back to college." The line "these kids are so much younger than meeee," kept repeating in my head.
Then later in the dream, my honey and I were travelling to the center of the state for some reason. And we kept suspecting there was a German Fest going on somewhere that we really needed to get to. I've never been to a German Fest, but it seemed really important that we go. There was to be cake involved, apparently. But each time we were almost there, a morose sense washed over me.
Normally when I dream of places of my youth, I tend to focus on the small town in the middle of nowhere where I spent my adolescence. I've not been back in 10 years, and have spent maybe only a whole day there since I graduated more than 10 years ago. I mostly hated it when I lived there; so backasswards provincial, I thought. But now that I live in a buzzing, bustling, city on the Eastern Seaboard, all I've wanted to do for the last 3 or 4 years is just spend a week in that middle of nowhere provincial town. I think part of it is because unlike my Honey whose family still lives where he spent his youth, and virtually all of my friends, because my fam doesn't live there anymore, I can't really return and settle with the ghosts.
As for my alma mater. We return to the city every year or so. I feel like I kind of deal with those ghosts. But I'm just overall homesick.
My hair is still wet and I have to leave for work in 15 minutes. VA Gal, have fun in South Africa for me. Pet some cheetas!